NEW BUSINESS INITIAL PUBLIC OFFERING
Readers of the excellent Port Stanley News are invited to invest in a new business
venture that promises huuuuge returns.
F.U. Promotions is about to launch a new line of T-shirts and posters featuring
memorable quotes from the Ward One Councillor from Port Stanley. The posters and
T-shirts will be highlighted by a prominent middle finger--upright-- and the slogan
Both of these items will be popular in the summer months and at election time. The
slogan, while offensive to a very, very few, have been endorsed heartily by Mayor
Marr and the members of the Council of Central Elgin and, apparently, by the citizens
of Port Stanley who have not voiced the tiniest objection to the conduct of Dan
F.U. Inc. has stated they expect immediate and huuuuge profits from this venture.
Proceeds will be donated to a fund to be used to restore decorum and decency to
our public proceedings.
CEO F.U. Promotions